TB&Me: Abatgul’s diary, part 5 – “One year completed”.

Abatgul is a journalist from Nukus in Uzbekistan. She's sharing extracts of the diary she kept during her treatment for drug-resistant tuberculosis... 

March 2009. A month with lots of holidays here in Uzbekistan. I can say that it is a special holiday for me as well. Because I can still dream and my heart is full of wishes. Looking back I realize that one year has gone. Now, if I move 7-8 months more forward gaining patience, mindfulness and be strong I will knock on the door of happiness. Behind the door I believe to find invaluable wealth – which is my health. I live with these thoughts surrounding me.

My daily activity is to go to the polyclinic, take my drugs and take the drug’s “kicking” (effects) for 1-2 hours. Every day in every way, keep patient, keep fighting back.

Life is a fight for survival – I think to myself, keeping my palm on my chest, over my left lung – I know you are recovering my innocent, soft lungs. I stopped everything just to cure you, I think neither of my profession nor my creativity.

What I know is my motto: “Forward for clear lungs”: I live only for it now. When I’ve got through this trial and I join the healthy people I know lots of good things and a happy life are waiting for me, this is how I believe, and I’m going for it.