Thanks again for reading.

People think I have HIV, but I know I don’t have HIV. I’m only suffering from TB. According to their thinking, I must have HIV because I was totally weak. Because of this, I have been neglected by some friends and relatives.  I know what they say behind my back – she’s HIV positive. Now she is fatter and doing well, she must be on the drugs, that’s why she’s doing well.

When I’m with them, they don’t say anything – only when I’m not there do they start backbiting me seriously. Those that know my life well, and believe that I am not HIV positive, were not happy when they heard these things. They called me and said Grace, please, be frank with them because what these people are saying, we are not happy about it. I always tell them, let them think the way they think.

I cannot tell you a lie my friends, that is the most stigma I have faced up to now, but I have a strong heart.

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16 Responses to Backbiting

  1. Pingback: TB&ME – TB patients share their stories in a new MSF blog | RESULTS UK – The Power to End Poverty

  2. I’d like to say is please be strong. You know in your heart what the truth is and that is all that matters. Rise above the words and know we love you.

  3. Be strong..don’t let them weaken your day, i pray for you..God never leave us!

  4. Sad, I can imagine how it must be feeling to you. Even God cannot change the Truth, so let them say…you stay strong. Eat well, think positive, take meds very regularly–and the immunity against the germs will booost.

  5. Dear Grace,

    It doesn’t matter what other people think of you. What matters more is that you know in yourself what is true and that you are making all the efforts you can to be cured and not to infect others. This disease has been a test of friendship and relationship and whoever chose to stay with you through these tough times are the people you should care for. Continue on praying for your wellness and the wellness of all MDR/XDR-TB patients around the world. Keep on sharing your thoughts and feelings that you’ve been going through. This could be an eye opener to others who are ill sensitive of the feelings of TB patients. Keep on writing.

    You are in my prayers.


  6. Grace, you have already proven your desire to fight for your future which looks positive…. Keep that in mind . You don’t have to prove anything to anyone except yourself. Remember people may have the power to victimize you… But oNLY YOU can decide to become a victim. There are so many things to be happy about don’t let the few negative strains dominate your healing progress. Bless you sweetheart! Let us know of your wonderful progress and new outlook on life!

  7. Have faith and you are alone , God is with you so turn to him and ask him to heal you. Don’t pay attention to others. If you can, get a plant and talk to the plant as they also listen and like to be loved and they do not talk back. Pour your love into your plant,if you despair do the same. As I know human beings being at their worst when you are weak and vulnerable, withdraw from them and find love around you, in nature, in a cloudess sky, within yourself. and Peace will surround you when you leave all wordly things away from your thoughts and alone you can conquer , because these people are stressing you. So are they worth having them? no.
    Someone who has been there.

  8. Grace, You are a blessing to me. I see your courage and it is very strong. Please do not focus on the negative thoughts of other people. They must choose to lose their fear and you can not control that. Keep always in your mind the love that God and your friends here and at home have for you. We are praying for you to stay strong and see the healing in time.

  9. Grace, You are a blessing to me and all who see your courage. You must not doubt yourself and the power of love and good medicine that will heal you. Please do not focus on the negative thoughts of others. Like your friends here have said, it is their fear talking. Remember your worth and never doubt the love from God and others for you.

  10. Sadly, people are afraid of illness even if it is not their own. Compassion for yourself and others can help to calm that fear. Be clear and direct with people as much as you are able to…truth is the only remedy for fear, other than courage. :-)

  11. Dear Grace,

    Thank you for sharing your experiences. It’s easy for me to identify with you since I became ill a few years ago and lost a great deal of weight after being hospitalized. Before the hospitalization people had many misconceptions about my illness (an abdominal mass/tumor that grew large without access to health care/health insurance). People often made hurtful remarks (directly and indirectly). I’m not sure why it’s so hard to treat others with compassion but it is. Sadly, people don’t seem to know when they need an education (to become better informed and to learn empathy/better communication skills).

    You should be cared for (by all) with respect and dignity… I will not hesitate to pray for healing for you. Also, I hope you find greater understanding and harmony with friends/relatives.

  12. Your name is Grace for a reason. May you be blessed with the good care medicine and respect. I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers. Much love and many blessings to you.

  13. The earth is under your feet and clear sky is above you and you are perfect and wonderful held between them. My wish for you is that you and MSF will find a way to love the TB out of your body and give you back your peace of mind. People say ugly things when they have fear, and not love, in their hearts. You do not need their fear, and there is no reason to take their fear upon yourself. You are love.

  14. Grace,

    I am happy that you are receiving medical treatment for TB, that is not an easy disease to conquer. I know it must be hurtful to you when your friends and relatives talk about you negatively, but you must stay positive. Your positive spirit will help you get well. Also, I don’t know what stigma being HIV+ must have in your village, but there are many people in America that are HIV+ and lead normal lives. It saddens me to know that people who need love and support the most are being neglected. But you are a beautiful person, and are on the road to good health, and you can be the one to offer support to others in need! Share your wonderful strength and spirit with them, and know that there are people all over the world that support you!

  15. Dear Grace, stay strong and stay positive – those people speaking behind your back will see in time that they were wrong. And those that are with you at this hard period of your life – those are your true friends and angels. At least now you can always know exactly whom you can count on in the future.

    Take care of yourself, never mind what some people may say – your health is most important. And stay positive – you should come out of this as a winner, a stronger and healthy person. I wish you a fast and smooth recovery from the very bottom of my heart!

  16. Indeed you do have a strong heart darlin’! Thanks for rising above the weak minded. Stay strong and know you are loved!

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